A quick note

 which is as much for my own mental health (important) as because I believe in transparency (also but somewhat less important), and in particular because I want to do my part to normalize talking about this (well this and so many other things) openly. 

I am recovering pretty well at this point from a really serous bout of major depression; it was and is of a largely external and situationally exerted nature, which .. stacked poorly with my own bipolarness.  If you do not struggle with either let me assure you it is entirely possible to be depressed while experiencing a man+ episode.  It is .. .a thing. 

A reminder that I am still, in many ways, working out my own language for a lot of this stuff.   Thank you for bearing with me.  

I made a post here in the bleakest of it but did not publish.  I am considering pushing it, with perhaps this as an introduction, but .. it''s really bare and I am not sure I am totally comfortable with baring that much of myself so directly;  (It odes not present me in a VERY POSITIVIE LIGHT AT ALL)  but on the other hand I generally do best when I push that envelope both personally and professionally. 

For me, always the only way forward is Through,   (Maenad yes but I am also a 6;3" Amazon.  I am of a hardy breed)  so I may yet release Sargasso. 

  Stay strong friends and siblings, we all have a long road yet to go. 

                                                            Most sincerely 

The Maenad


Comments

Post a Comment

Well trod garden paths

2023

Image
  ... Has been a long hard trip. I’ve had … other years as challenging as this one. 2001 when I left Texas, 2004 when I had to leave university (and San Angelo, where my kid was) as I had no where else to live, and of course 2008 when I moved to California and lost my fucking mind. All of these, rough, some voluntary, some not, hard times of ungentle transition. Many bridges are burning, even though I did not light them. All I had to do was insist on my boundaries and my needs, and let those who would not – could not – respect this, find the door out of my life. And like some of those years, this has been among the worst years of my life. It wasn’t *all* bad of course. I’ve grown, tremendously, I’ve done actual metric fuckloads of self-work this year. (You may not think it but it takes quite a bit of self-knowledge and even more courage for the Queen of Excess to admit and acknowledge when she is overstimulated.) I published my second collection, this one a CNF/Poe...
Read more

Capsule Review - Trans Dimensional Beings

 I loved this album - I did not intend to listen to it in it's entirety at first sitting but it sucked my perceptions in, and did so in the best way almost immediately.   To me it is very centering and oddly calming. Like a controlled factory reset for the brain, about 11 or 12 times consecutively.   This is a unique and highly experimental sound and I dig it a great deal.   It's wonderful.  Trans Dimensional Beings on Soundcloud
Read more

Do you have a story about accessing sexual, reproductive, or gender affirming health care?

Image
  Seeking Storytellers!! Do you have a story to share about accessing healthcare? What is the goal of the project? This project aims to document and disseminate the stories of women and gender diverse people with disabilities who have accessed, or attempted to access, sexual and reproductive healthcare or gender affirming healthcare in the United States. We hope that by sharing this information publicly, we can increase understanding about the barriers that exist and advocate to ensure improved access for all. Who is eligible to participate? People who meet all of the following criteria: Identify as a person with a disability Identify as a woman (cis or trans), a transgender man, nonbinary, and gender diverse Have accessed or attempted to access sexual and reproductive healthcare, such as routine and preventative care, information and care related to sexually transmitted infections [STIs], fertility care, pregnancy care, abortion care, or have...
Read more